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the Submissive in You - It's all about the Bottoms Being a bottom may not always be an easy thing to do. First of all the implication of being a bottom can mean a number of things. It could mean you are submissive to your partner, or it could mean that you are the one that submits in bed as the taker as opposed to the giver. Regardless of what it means for your situation it may mean that you are out there looking for your top and you won't give up until you find him. Many men will go out and meet a guy they like - but once the topic comes up of top or bottom and they realize that they are either both bottoms, or both tops, they will generally stop talking. If it's not going to work in bed, and one isn't willing to switch roles and be versatile, then there is no point in moving on with things. Versatility is something that has come out on the Internet in a rampant sense. It has been said by many homosexuals that there are more bottoms than there are tops. If you've visited the gay personals you may see the attribute 'versatile' a lot. Unfortunately, many bottoms will list this. Versatile does not truly mean they are versatile: instead it's a keyword for "I'm a bottom but I will top if I have to." Many men that list 'versatile' in their profiles will end up talking and find out that they are not going to be able to mesh. This is because, for the most part, 'versatile ways' usually means that they are true bottoms at heart. If you are a bottom, and that is what satisfies you, then you should be honest. After all, there is no point in going through topping if you aren't going to have fun doing it. Of course, there are levels of bottoms. Something new cropping up is known as the 'power bottom'. The power bottom is highly selective about the tops they will spend time with. Some of them go so far as to have size specifications. If you are a top that doesn't 'meet the grade' then this bottom will surely be ignoring all you have to offer. Some power bottoms have been known to have only been with 1 or 2 men - even after years of having come out. Being a bottom does not mean that you are a soft, feminine looking creature that likes to dress in drag. It doesn't mean you're petite and short either. In fact, many in the gay community would tell you it's quite the opposite. The petite and sweet drag queens may love to top, while those sexy quarterback types might love the feel of their lover above them. Finally, there are the rare men that are tops until they find the emotional connection they seek which will allow them to happily bottom. Some men just are not ready to bottom until they find a loving, stable relationship where there is a comfort level. These men learn to immensely enjoy being the bottom in the relationship. However, if the relationship were to end it is likely they would go back to being a top - until they found that comfort space again. It doesn't really matter what type of bottom you are, but rather that you are honest about what you are looking for. Sure, there are plenty of bottoms out there - but are you truly interested in topping in a relationship? If not, now is the time to be honest. Tell the men you meet, or the ones looking at your profile, that you are a bottom. You may have competition, but face it - you have competition anyhow. You're better off to make sure you end up getting into a position you're interested in, as opposed to one your comfortable in but not satisfied with. Be honest and you will be sure to find a situation that suits all your needs in time. For more information read Man to Man: The Ultimate Guide to Gay Sex. |
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